Thursday, March 31, 2011

Nyala Ethiopian Food

Driving back from MacArthur park during rush hour is not fun so I decided to stop halfway in Little Ethiopia to get my food on. I pulled up to the curb tearing so much ass I ripped a piece of it off. My truck has serious rat balls.

I used to eat at Merkato all the time until one day I sat there for a good 45 min waiting for my check and I had to get up and ask them for it. Bad move Merkato, also your place overwhelmingly reeks of that fucking incense garbage, so much so that I break out in hives when I step foot in there. Merkato you get ZERO plunges.

So back to my review of Nyala. I usually go here for All-U-Can-Cram but that ends at 3pm. So this time I went in with my alibi Giovanna. With her present I could order the Vegetarian Combo Plate FOR TWO and eat it all myself, which is what I did. Gia was bitching about her doctor or her mom or something, I don't know cause I don't listen to a word women say, so she was not in the mood to eat. I managed to horf down the entire meal without having to take a dump, which rarely occurs at an Ethiopian place. I destroyed 12 pieces of that spongy Ninjera bread, that shit rules cause it's named after Ninja Turtles or Nintendo or Nine Inch Nails something. The BEST part about eating Ethiopian food is the burps. I love tasting those spices for HOURS afterward. One can eat this food for breakfast and not have to eat anything for the rest of the day, he can just survive on his own burps. The WORST part about this food is trying to sleep after eating it. I think they keep all those things separate on that plate for a reason. They are like beta fish, once they are in your stomach it's ALL OUT WAR. Try sleeping without waking yourself up at 3 am with what you think is a space shuttle re-entering the atmosphere only to find out it was a fart. There should be a plaque on the door warning people: DO NOT EAT Ethiopian food after 5 pm if you have to get up for work the next morning.

Overall I rate Nyala 4/5 Plunges.




My suggestion: All-U-Can-Cram-All-Day-Long! Just so us fat vegan bloggers can save face. ;)

Nyala Ethiopian Cuisine
1076 S Fairfax Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90019



4 comments:

  1. You listen to the things *I* say

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  2. You are a genius, I never thought of bringing a cover person. You need to try to conquer the FULL Soul plate at Stuff I Eat in Inglewood. You get scolded if you try to eat it by yourself.

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  3. I'm prettt pro at eating I'm sure I could waltz in their and blow their mind. I'll do that thing where my friend goes to the bathroom and the food is all gone when they get back.

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