New York: Dos Toros Taquera

So, I'm in New York and the first restaurant I eat at is a Mexican place. Not only am I Mexican, but I live in LA, the fucking capital of Mexican Food (except maybe Mexico). My thugdog Jason and I met up with some friends at a Belgian beer bar in the West Village. We pounded down a few brewdogs, p3rved out on some local tang-tang and left to go eat. I looked up where to eat on my phone, Yelp said there was a place 0.18 miles from where I was standing. Since it was the nearest place to eat, and also cause I'm a lazy Mexican, we walked to Dos Toros.

This place is basically a Chipotle. They have a bunch of meats and garbage you can throw into either a burrito, taco or a salad. Since I am fond of cylindrical objects measuring eight inches long, I chose to get a burrito. I asked about the beans and the rice. Luckily I did 'cause they have a regular chicken stock rice and a vegan rice. I got a bean and rice burrito with pico de gallo and quac. Then they asked me if I wanted hot sawse. I looked at him and said, "Listen, do you know who I am? I'm the Vegan Butthole Explosion guy. Are you seriously asking me if I want hot sauce? OF COURSE I FUCKING WANT HOT SAUCE YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!!!" So yeah. The burrito was not undelicious. It was definitely a California burrito in NY. I always hear people bitch about how New Yorkers don't know how to make a burrito correctly. Well it seems like this place got it right, so pull your thumbs out of your culos and get your asses over there.

4/5 Plunges