Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Vegan Pizza Garden Grove

Sup pimps, playas and hustlas? Tonight I will review a place in Garbage Grove called Vegan Pizza. Of course most of you know that vegan pizza is my favorite thing in the universe; better than blowjobs, better than heroin, even better than taking that first huge dump when you wake up in the morning. So why does a place called Vegan Pizza exist in the city I grew up in? Because the world is a fucked up place. If this place was around when I was a teenager I would have single-handedly made them billionaires. I used to drink 40s in the drainage ditch right down the street from this place, I even got arrested for truancy right on the corner of Chapman and West. Going back to this area brought back some serious memories.

As for the food, well they have all the crap you would get at a carnival: corn dogs, pizza, buffalo wings, burgers. I wanted to order everything on the menu but I didn't want to look like King Chub, so I got a corn dog, the buffalo wings and a snausage n cheese calzone. The cron dog was great, just like I remember them, warm, thick, salty, veiny and full of semen. The buffalo wings were a disappointment, they were just regular Gardein frozen chicken wings with a side of hot sauze. The calzone on the other hand was heaven on earth. It's like Jesus came down, touched my penis and gave me an exquisitely huge boner for 7 days and 7 nights. When I die bury me with a calzone and a bottle of Evan Williams. Great food and the price is decently cheap.
3/5 Plunges.
 





Vegan Pizza
12022 Chapman Ave
Garden Grove, CA 92840
(714) 750-8686

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